Happy Fathers Day! Dads, kids and cars

Get them on the go as soon as you can; get them enthusiastic; but leave time for a cuddle.

Today is Fathers Day. A day when the brood tell Dad how wonderful he is. If they remember. A day to remember that Dads have a big place in the life of their children, and no more so than when it comes to cars. So what do Dads teach their offspring about cars? Well, apart from getting them mobile on anything that moves as early as you can – and getting them enthusiastic – what are the basics?

Teach them to drive.

Get ‘em started early. How early? For the stuff like sitting on your lap and steering, as soon as they can. Get them changing gear from the passenger seat as soon as they can too, although elf’n'safety probably don’t allow anyone under 45 in the passenger seat any more.

But what about actual driving? As soon as their little feet can reach the pedals and they can see over the steering wheel. How old is that? Oh, once they’re in double figures should suit. Best to avoid proper roads, but there’s plenty of empty car parks on a Sunday. And farm tracks. And if you’re lucky, private roads. My youngest was flying a BMW 740 around at aged 10.

Teach them to look after their cars

This one doesn’t go down half as well as the driving bit. Get them out on a Sunday morning with a bucket full of soapy water, a sponge and a chamois. Under 10 it’s a decent game – especially when Dad gets wet. After that it’s very uncool. But a thick ear solves that problem. Although you’ll probably get arrested for that now.

And teach them to at least do the basics. Change a tyre is a must, as is checking tyre pressures, oil, washer fluid and coolant. Yes, they can look at the dash for that stuff now, but knowing the basics is no bad thing –  especially the wheel change. Girls too. Actually, especially girls.

And although no one seems to do car repairs at home any more, if you do – or you’re playing silly buggers with a restoration project – children are very useful, especially under 10. At that age they love to get dirty and oily, and their little hands and arms are great for getting dropped bolts out of inacessible bits of the car. But don’t tell mum.

Teach them how to buy a car

Teach them that the price on the car isn’t the price you pay. Ever. Don’t discuss anything with the salesman until you’ve agreed a price. Hint – strongly – that you’ll need to finance the car, and then haggle. Aim to get 10% off. At least. And when you have, and you’ve shaken hands, tell him you do need to finance it – but you’ve already sorted that. And don’t buy the gap insurance. Or the paint insurance. Or any insurance from a car dealer. Ever.

And teach them the difference between need and want. Need is the car you use every day. The one that gets you to work and back. The one you pile your own kids in. It needs to be as new as possible with a good balance between economy, quality and performance. And this is the one you need to lease and chop in every couple of years for a newer one. Make it part of your life budget – just like a mortgage.

And then there’s the ‘Want’. That’s the classic; the supercar; the hypercar; the “I must own one of those before I die” cars. You get those when everything else is sorted. When the daily drive doesn’t hurt your wallet. When the mortgage is a breeze and the holidays are sorted and there’s money left at the end of the month, not month left at the end of the money.

And that’s the job of a Dad. And when you’ve spent what seems like half a lifetime doing just that; being a responsible parent; teaching them to stand on their own two feet; teaching them to be responsible but enjoy life; work hard (I always tell mine it’s the rent you pay for life) but play hard too, you can feel happy you’ve done your very best. Been a good Dad. A responsible, loving, caring Dad.

And then the phone rings. And a voice at the end says “Daaad”. And you know that whatever you’ve taught them – however self-sufficient they’ve become – you’ve taught them one thing better than anything else. Dad’ll fix it. Whatever the problem. Whatever the time of day. Whatever the cost.

And moan though you do, inside you smile. Because you wouldn’t change that for the world.

By Cars UK