One Lap of the Web: Fastest burger in the West

-- Orange Coast Magazine has a profile on the mysterious Lynsi Snyder, CEO and heiress to the greatest hamburger in America, In-N-Out Burger. (If you dispute this, I will come to your house and stomp on your perennials.) Fun fact: she is also an accomplished drag racer, racing an nine-second Dodge Dart in the NHRA's front-drive SS/HA class; she also splits her seat time between a 1970 Plymouth Hemi 'Cuda and a 1984 Chevy Camaro. In-N-Out also sponsors Melanie Troxel's Dodge Charger R/T funny car, which we assume emits the tantalizing aroma of an Animal Style Double-Double as it races down every quarter mile.

-- How many launches can you do with a Porsche 911 Turbo before you break it? Perpetually hyperactive rally badass Bill Caswell finds out. He pulled off fifty, for the symbolism -- but he actually lost count at 61 runs with Porsche's unbreakable Launch Control before he got bored and wandered off for lunch.

-- Bryan Young bought a 1991 Mazda Miata with 200,000 miles on it for $1,000. It was entirely stock, but he welded the rear differential and took it drifting. Then, he started winning drift competitions. And in a wildly simple effort that we wish we had thought of first, he started stretching pieces of square vinyl (not electrical tape) across the body panels for a super rad 8-bit effect. The 8-Bit Miata is a stroke of inspired retro genius, and we wish our hero all the best. For great justice.

-- For all the fellas out there with ladies to impress, just remember this: the fastest way to a gal's heart is through Ford Mustang-shaped chocolate extruded by a robot. (Girls like horses, Mustangs are horses, there must be some correlation here.) Ford commissioned some 3D-printed candy bars shaped like Mustangs from The Sugar Lab in LA, which specializes in this sort of thing: its website says, "we're bringing 3D printing technology to the genre of mega-cool cakes." Hey, sugar is sugar no matter how much it looks like Buckminsterfullerene. Mustang chocolates aren't available for sale yet; if you want your fix of Mustang chocolate you could always go to the 2014 Mustang Annual Chocolate Festival in Mustang, Oklahoma.

Image via Flickr.

By Blake Z. Rong